In 2005, my friend Steve told me, “I love my job.” I was envious because at the time I felt unfulfilled in my work. I realize now that envy can be a gift. It acts as a neon sign that announces, “I want this for myself!” And it presents two options – change nothing and remain safe and miserable or do something different.
Here are three ways to do something different:
- Clarify – What about this person’s experience do I want? As it related to Steve, I realized that I wanted to use more of my creative skills, and I wanted to wake up in the morning looking forward to going to work.
- Self esteem check up – For me there’s often a hidden worthiness issue to clear up. I had to explore why I felt undeserving of a happy work life and with the help of therapy, affirmations and supportive friends turn that (crap) around.
- Bless their success – To bring my thinking to a more positive place, I now catch myself when I’m feeling envy and quickly wish that person happiness and well being.
Today I can honestly say, “I love my job!” And I no longer feel Steve-envy.
Have you ever moved from envy to achievement? What are your tips?
Did you know that according to one study, if you write a goal down, you’re 60% more apt to achieve it? You did if you read last week’s blog. Here’s the recap:
Writing goals can be a powerful way to create the life and career you want. The BEST format helps you think through and phrase your goals in the most empowering way possible. BEST stands for:
In today’s blog, we’ll focus on the E. Energizing.
When you think about achieving your stated goal, are you excited? Do you feel energized by it? If so, your goal has passed the Energizing Test.
Some people write goals for themselves that they don’t really want to achieve. Writing a goal and not being excited about it is usually the result of trying to want something that someone else wants you to want. It’s trying to be someone your not. Or in the simplest terms: people pleasing.
Let’s face it, goal setting usually means changing habits and trying new behaviors. It can be challenging so it better be worth it to you. That’s why it’s key to make sure your goals are energizing.
Next week, we’ll discuss the “S” in BEST. Are you psyched?
Did you know that according to one study, if you write a goal down, you’re 60% more apt to achieve it? Writing goals can be a powerful way to create the life and career you want.
The BEST format helps you think through and phrase your goal in the most empowering way possible. BEST stands for:
In today’s blog, we’ll focus on the B. Believable.
There’s only one person who gets to decide if your goal is believable: you. We all have greatness within us, and sometimes that greatness hasn’t yet had a chance to blossom.
Does your goal come from a quiet inner place inside that Knows (with a capital “K”) what you’re truly capable of? If so, then you go ahead and write that goal down. Though it might seem silly or “out there” or impossible to others, it’s yours to claim.
I remember it well. I was driving with a successful friend at a time in my life when I felt very UN-successful. I wasn’t earning a lot and was doing very unglamorous work. Even so, I knew that I was an inspirational keynote speaker. “I’m a keynote speaker,” I said to her in a small voice. It sounded ridiculous coming out of my mouth given my life circumstances.
Let’s fast forward to the life I’m living today where keynote speaking seems obvious. I’m sitting in a lovely hotel tapping away on my laptop waiting to meet with a colleague to discuss our keynote marketing materials. It’s happening!
What do you know that no one’s judgment or criticism can shake? Write that goal down and if you would indulge me – tell me what it is!
Years ago, I would daydream about things that I wished would happen. Once I told one of these fantasies to my friend, Cindy:
I wish I could be interviewed for a radio show.
Before I continue this story, I should tell you that Cindy is one of the most successful, goal-setting and goal reaching people I know. She has created and sold a business, directed and produced a film on the film festival circuit, started two non-profits and bought two houses. Are you getting the idea?
Cindy gave me a funny look as if I was truly an odd person. She was about to share with me one of my most powerful lessons that year. I think she was shocked that I didn’t already know it. She said, “Why don’t you change the word ‘fantasy’ and use the world ‘goal’ instead? Then figure out what actions will bring you to that goal?”
Is it as easy as that? Well, yes. And no.
Cindy’s suggestion that rather than just hope a radio segment producer would randomly think to contact me that I could proactively contact that person myself scared me. It challenged how I thought of myself. At the time, I didn’t see myself as “big enough” for such a glamorous opportunity. So what I discovered about myself is that daydreams and fantasies were a way to soothe myself. I was able to stay in the comfort of a smaller life without risking, growing and changing.
Do you ever find yourself daydreaming about longed for experiences without taking action? You’re not alone. Stay tuned, we’re going to talk more on this subject.
About being a radio show guest – yes, I finally did it! The interview is about being a “Power Presenter” and here’s a link.
I hear this too often in my seminars: I’m just an Administrative Assistant. I want to steal the word “just” from that person’s vocabulary. Imagine if every admin in this country stopped working?
April 22 is Administrative Professionals Day. To celebrate and honor the admins who help run offices all around the world, I have a gift and a an announcement.
First, a gift for everyone: Enjoy 30 minutes of “chillaxation.” Here’s the free playback number: (218) 844-8799. And here’s the access code: 1092282#. There will be a pause, and then it begins.
Next is the announcement. I am creating two products especially for Administrative Assistants: an e-book on goal setting and a video series for stress relief. I’ll keep you posted on my progress!
Curious to know more about Administrative Professionals Day? Here’s more info.
What can you do this week that scares you?
To keep your life feeling vital and your self esteem high, consider a commitment that will stretch but not break you. You could have that critical conversation that you’ve been putting off or take a class doing something you’re interested in but not particularly good at. For one of my friends, it would be to put up an internet dating profile.
Mine? I’m going to send invitations for my first ever teleseminar. It’s on stress management, and you can expect my invite in your inbox soon. How does it make me feel? Totally out of my comfort zone; that’s the whole point!
Care to share your scary commitment? I’d love to support and be inspired by you.
Jean I’m-All-Ears Franzblau